Exposure

It’s a hard thing to write about oneself.  To really put it out there.  To let anybody that wants to see in, take a peek.  Writing about my own personal feelings can be unsettling.  I can’t help it.  I want to be perfect.  I look at my friends on social media and their lives look like perfection.  They seem to be having the best time.  It appears nothing goes wrong at their beautifully decorated homes. They attend exciting events. They have nice clothes. They go on lavish vacations.  They eat beautiful food.  They appear to be so very happy.  Makes me say “it’s good to be them”.  Sometimes the thought crosses my mind that my life doesn’t really look like that.  More and more we feel compelled to make our lives look fairy tale story book, when in reality it is completely opposite.  Jesus said we were going to have trouble; I believe Him.  The Psalmist said “many are the troubles of the righteous”.  It’s hard to let someone see how you did it and it might not have turned out so good and you ended up in trouble.  God bless all those sweet ladies that will post the “Pinterest Fails”.

Lately my husband and I have been attending a class  called “The Search for Significance”.  How do we live a life that matters.  How do we do something more noble than sit around and eat the groceries and try to get a fat bank account.  Something more than stage a vignette, take a picture, run it through half a dozen filters, post it and then wait for everyone to “like” it.  To make my life something more than how nice my house is and how impressive my car might be.  It’s been a troubling study for me.  The reason is because there are some things I need to change.

For starters, I need to be more intentional with my actions.  That means I will have to reach out to some people and love them on purpose.  Sometimes that reach will be uncomfortable.  It may be welcomed and sometimes it may be rejected. Sometimes I’ll have to share feelings and experiences that I would rather keep hidden – because I want to look like I’ve done it all perfectly when I really haven’t.  I want to look like everything is fine.  I’ll have to let some people know that some of those lessons I’ve learned were learned through mistakes.  Here is something I’ve experienced that really resonates with me.  It’s one thing for somebody to tell you how to do it right with no point of reference, it’s entirely another when they speak from experience.  The ones who are willing to expose their mistakes and failures and be gracious enough to share with me how they could have been avoided – those people really have my attention.  I value their insight.  Are they willing to let me see in?  I need to know that they are human.  I need to know that they actually had a struggle and this is what they tried and how that turned out.  They aren’t perfect people on social media.  They are real.  I need to be real.

With all this in mind I would like to say welcome to the holidays.  They won’t be without stress.  They won’t be perfect.  We are really flawed.  That Thanksgiving tablescape may be really gorgeous and the Christmas tree may be very impressive, and that’s really nice, but it doesn’t mean that everything is perfect.  Those smiles may be covering up hurt, anger, depression and tears.  They may be covering up family rifts and loneliness.  Let’s intentionally look for people we can help and encourage.  Let’s intentionally look for somebody with which we can share a word that would really change their perspective.  Let’s intentionally tell each other that we love each other in spite of all our shortcomings and misunderstandings.  Let’s intentionally apologize.  Let’s not be so perfect that we refuse to share a past experience that was learned through a mistake, when it would help somebody through their hurts.  That’s the reason I share my feelings on this blog.  I want to say an encouraging word to someone who is in a struggle.  I want it to help somebody.  Jesus wants to help you even more.